Anonymous asked:
would you mind adding gender neutral pronouns (they/them) to your post about dysphoria? Not everyone who experiences dysphoria uses binary pronouns.

I will try! I still don’t know HTML coding and have no clue as to how to change it. Thank you though, for bringing it to my attention!


Anonymous asked:
A month ago I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me. We talked about it and have been trying to work things out but it's put a strain on our relationship. He also has recently started therapy for his transition and has suddenly become really distant. He says it's because I've become clingy, and I know I have more more needy than usual because I feel insecure after his cheating. I don't know the best way to mend things and if his focus on his transition has anything to do with his distance.

Some of it may be from his transition. He has a lot on his mind, and therapy can sometimes seem like a set of hoops to jump through, rather than something beneficial. It can be hard to focus on a the jists of a relationship. But some of it may have to do with things going on in the relationship.

It is hard to help with what little information I have. You have every reason to feel insecure, it happens to a lot of people and it’s hard for others to see how this affects people. If you are acknowledging that you feel this way make sure you tell him. Ask him what you can do to be less clingy, and tell him what makes you feel so insecure. Make sure you guys try to talk. Reassure one another.

Another thing may be if he has started T recently or not. This can cause huge changes in mood and behavior. This is something you really have to ride out and gauge how things are going to happen. After the adjustment period things may return back to normal, but sometimes they don’t, it really just depends on the individual.

In your case you could try giving him some space. Tell yourself that it is time to try to trust him again. Relationships that continue without trust tend to be problematic and do not end well. Give him time and trust and respect. If he cheats again then he does not respect you and it is probably time to leave, for yourself. You always deserve loyalty and respect. It’s going to be stressful and worrisome, but this happens sometimes and it’s not your fault and has nothing to do with his transition.

So, just try to keep that communication open. Validate each others’ feelings, and reassure one another. Be respectful of what the other is feeling and discuss ways to resolve the situation. 

I am sorry it took so long to reply. I have some messages saved in my inbox and yours was bumped to the bottom? Anyway I hope everyone is well!

~Tiegen


Update from Michigan

Hey lovely followers! It’s been kind of quiet around here so I wanted to let you guys know about the trial to be watching out for.

Michigan courts will be looking in to same-sex parenting, same-sex adoption, and same sex marriage. This is HUGE for Michigan since it has a constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage, as well as no parental rights for same-sex couples. It even bans civil unions. Keep an eye out because this will be a great step forward for the LGBT community in Michigan and surrounding areas!

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2014/02/24/michigan-same-sex-trial/5777963/

This Big Transgender Ruling Is Worth Your Attention

Wayne Maines was in a meeting when he got the call. His daughter, a transgender teenager who had been fighting the state of Maine for years over her right to use the girls’ bathroom at school, had finally won. I just broke down right then …

Anonymous asked:
My parents met my boyfriend before he started his transition, and they see him as his past. We have been dating for awhile now, and I can tell my parents are getting suspicious because of all the snide comments. My boyfriend wants me to tell them soon, and I don't know how to. My parents are also very religious, and since I'm the youngest I am on a much shorter leash. How can I tell them in a way that they will understand

If he is comfortable with you telling them then this is a step in the right direction.
Talk to him about why you are so uncomfortable at this time telling them. Maybe you guys can brainstorm together to figure out a way to tell them.

If they are already appearing to have a problem with this, ask them what is going on. You have to enter in to these situations with a completely open mind, especially because of what can potentially be said during these conversations. The truth may be painful, but at least you will know.

As for a way to tell them it really depends on the parent. You can start of addressing them individually, starting with whom you thing may be more receptive to this and asking them how to address the other parent. Also, knowing how to talk to them giving you enough time to explain you thoughts and feelings. But you have to listen in return and try to keep the conversation as peaceful as possible.

I found writing my mom letters was best. This allowed me to get all of my feelings out at once without being interrupted. Also she could have her reactions in privacy. She was the more difficult one and she is not at all religious.
My dad I just outright told. He was very understanding, which I was not expecting because he is religious.
The rest of my family has no idea because Kadyn wishes to be stealth, as a matter of fact he wishes no one knew at all.

I hope that all goes well. It is fairly difficult to answer these type of questions without really knowing the individual or their family. Very religious individuals are hard to gauge as well, as it can go either way. If you have any more questions though please feel free to ask and I will try to help as best as possible!

If anyone has any suggestions or examples of their own please feel free to share! You can SUBMIT them or ask them anonymously!

Tiegen


Anonymous asked:
I'm currently questioning and my boyfriend is uncomfortable with the male side of me. However, he says that he wants to help me through it but I'm scared because he's said before that he just doesn't like the guy part and he's straight. Is there any way to help him understand/adjust?

Talking to him about it is what is going to help the most. It is hard sometimes for people to understand where you will fit in their life as you make these changes. 

Unfortunately there is no way to help him adjust his sexuality. Over time he may or may not be more comfortable with this side of you. How he feels and defines those feelings are completely up to him. Most times this is the most painful part of transitioning, losing the ones you love. All you can do is be supportive and understanding of his point of view as well and do whatever makes YOU happy. Keeping that line of communication open with him is going to be really important as you make your decisions moving forward. If he still wants to be supportive then this is going to be a great asset to you, even if your intimate relationship turns into one of just friendship.

In the mean time here are some things you can try talking to him about to help:

  • Ask him what makes him uncomfortable and what you can do to help.
  • Discuss the specifics of transitioning and how far into the transition you want or will go. Even discussing the time frame that this will occur will help because while some transition quickly, many take years.
  • Ask him where he would like the relationship to progress to and what his plans are for either scenario. How will your lives fit together if you choose to transition or not.

This is very basic but can lead to anywhere.

~Tiegen


Post Holidays

Hello lovely followers! I hope you all had a wonderful holiday!

Now that the holiday season is done I will be answering the few asks I have currently. I will be attempting to fill the queue with the chapters from the Table of Contents since I still have no idea how to add them myself.

Thank you for your continued loyalty!

Tiegen

Post-Op Recovery - A Guide for Those in The Waiting Room

theartoftransliness:

Supporting recovery, any kind of recovery, is a skill that all people should try to develop. As a transperson who’s opting for surgery, we often see these skills played out by others in our lives, benefiting from them, being nurtured by them. We all have our preferences for receiving support, but…

ourtimeorg:

BREAKING: New Mexico Supreme Court rules denying marriage to same-sex couples unconstitutional, making it the 17th state to allow marriage equality.

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